Text the Pansexual ♥

I'm serious, text me~

I'm super bored and looking for friends who are like me.

Please, anyone who actually looks at my blog, message me through my number (609-335-3975) or my emails which I check regularly (solerlacrimosa@gmail.com, xxbloodyxmaryxx@gmail.com, emobrokencydebabe@hotmail.com)

I'm open to everyone.

Pansexual Seeking Significant Other

Hey guys, so lately I've been feeling down, and that's no good. However I've been thinking a lot about having someone to hold dear. A significant other. I feel like being in a relationship would make me happier and make me look forward to stuff.

I'm openly pansexual to add.

I just really want a relationship even if it's an online relationship.

Yeah, that's all. Ignore me.

What Can I Say ?

What can I say ?
I'm a little depressing, I get sad a lot, I sometimes self harm, and have really bad thoughts, but I'm only human.
I am not perfect, I'm this 270lb, half black/half Puerto Rican lady who loves the theatre. 
I'm 17 years old, just 2 months shy of my 18th birthday.
I'm one to express my feelings in every possible way (usually negatively).
I don't know what to do right now, I'm upset.
I don't want to commit suicide, I don't want to harm myself right now.
I just want to feel relaxed and happy.
My one true love; stage crew and all things that deal with the backstage aspects of theatre. 
I crave that, it is what keeps me sane, it's what keeps me alive.
I've been having problems as of late with some people and the number one person is my "friend" Kiley.
I don't know if I should talk to her or what, I feel like she wants nothing to do with me.
And I also feel like she thinks I want nothing to do with her.
We both need to talk and get stuff out, because in reality, and honestly I don't want to lose her.
I'm gonna go do a mediation with her today I suppose. 
Wish me luck.
Thanks for letting me vent.

Sorry, I've been missing

I've just been having a rough time, lately...so yeah


I'll post more soon, I promise


I just need a break for awhile


Everything is hard

So basically...

So basically, I'm sad, I'm angry, I'm upset, I'm just done.

All I see is despair and nothingness and I can't stand it.

Where is the light in my life ?

It's like someone extinguished the flame that was burning as bright as it could.

My feelings have gradually been getting worse, and I feel as though there's no point in anything.

I want to be fine with myself, and I don't feel fine with myself.

I had to leave school early yesterday and blow off Drama because I just couldn't. I couldn't deal with the rest of the day.

It was agonizing.

I have some cuts on my left arm (that I inflicted) and today I added my own flair to the cuts by writing the words Cut Me with an arrow pointing towards the wounds.

I don't know, I wish someone was here for me, I wish I wasn't alone.

It's horrid, and I can't.

I just can't.

I was on omegle last night.

I talked to one nice guy for little. (If anyone wants to talk to me fyi, comment, email me, whatever...I'm constantly lonely, and always wish for a voice to communicate with)

I don't wanna get into why I'm upset or angry or all these stupid emotions.

Maybe another post.

UGH WHY ?

So, my throat is killing me, and it's bothering the hell outta me. My head uber hurts, really bad headache.

Oh, and today I was informed that I will be going for a check up, due to my self harm.


On a lighter note, I am planning out some cosplays for when i lose the weight, extremely excited.

Ugh, signing off because my head is starting to pound, goodbye dears~

Back from the Dead...

I have finally returned, but I bring neutral news....I have started biting myself as a coping mechanism for my anxiety and my depressed states of mind. I have left my hand, swollen and red, that is not okay, but whatever. I consider it better than cutting for now.

My friend is upset, and he won't tell me why....it is another reason I bite, I don't like that he's miserable, I wish I could take his misery away.

I promise to come back, if someone actually reads my blog, so be prepared for some posts.

Also anyone going to AnimeNEXT in June ? I am possibly~ It was fun last year